Scary Foods II.........
Nov. 7th, 2003 01:04 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
poltr1In Scary Foods I, I talked about the foods that were scary based on their name alone. In this installment, I'll discuss my least favorite foods because of how they look, smell, feel, or taste. (And in some cases, sound.) I'll skip the ones covered in the comments of the original post.
Some of these are the result of "waste not, want not" -- the leftover parts of the animal that didn't become steak or ham.
Mortadella. What are those big white chunks in there? Is that cheese or is it fat? And the first syllable is "Mort" -- that means "dead", right? As in "I'll be dead if I eat this."?
Liver. Dark red, bloody, and runny. Need I say more?
Limburger cheese. Renouned for its overpowering stench. I've never been brave enough to actually taste it.
Tripe. Looks like a honeycomb, but it's really a cow's stomach.
Deep-fried pork rinds. Sounds like an artery-clogger to me.
Chitterlings. Also called chitlins. It's supposed to be soul food, but it's an animal's intestines. The only time I eat intestines is when it's used for hot dog or sausage casings.
Pigs' feet. What have those feet walked in? Where have they been? (My mom used to add one to a pot of spaghetti sauce. I hated getting the bones or the rubbery skin.)
Chicken feet. Ditto. (These add body to chicken soup.)
Chinese shrimp sauce. This flesh-colored sauce smells and tastes like dirty feet to me.
Cojones del toro. A South American delicacy; perhaps a Spanish one as well. This could be used as proof that "you are what you eat".
Sunny Delight. It's supposed to be good for you. But most of it is not real juice! It's probably reconstituted Tang or something. Has anyone checked to see if this stuff glows under a black light?
Suet. This stuff is for the birds. Really. Eating this is about as bad for you as eating Crisco shortening by the spoonful.
Lard. Ditto.
Margarine. Just received an email today from someone who said that margarine is one atom away from being plastic. All oil and virtually no flavor. I'll stick to butter instead.
Instant tea. An idea whose time has not yet come. Somehow, the earthy bittnerness of "dried leaves soaked in boiling water" is replaced by something more nasty.
Fish and seafood with the head still attached. I love most fish and seafood, but I don't like having my food stare back at me while I eat it. Gives me the willies!
Some of these are the result of "waste not, want not" -- the leftover parts of the animal that didn't become steak or ham.
Mortadella. What are those big white chunks in there? Is that cheese or is it fat? And the first syllable is "Mort" -- that means "dead", right? As in "I'll be dead if I eat this."?
Liver. Dark red, bloody, and runny. Need I say more?
Limburger cheese. Renouned for its overpowering stench. I've never been brave enough to actually taste it.
Tripe. Looks like a honeycomb, but it's really a cow's stomach.
Deep-fried pork rinds. Sounds like an artery-clogger to me.
Chitterlings. Also called chitlins. It's supposed to be soul food, but it's an animal's intestines. The only time I eat intestines is when it's used for hot dog or sausage casings.
Pigs' feet. What have those feet walked in? Where have they been? (My mom used to add one to a pot of spaghetti sauce. I hated getting the bones or the rubbery skin.)
Chicken feet. Ditto. (These add body to chicken soup.)
Chinese shrimp sauce. This flesh-colored sauce smells and tastes like dirty feet to me.
Cojones del toro. A South American delicacy; perhaps a Spanish one as well. This could be used as proof that "you are what you eat".
Sunny Delight. It's supposed to be good for you. But most of it is not real juice! It's probably reconstituted Tang or something. Has anyone checked to see if this stuff glows under a black light?
Suet. This stuff is for the birds. Really. Eating this is about as bad for you as eating Crisco shortening by the spoonful.
Lard. Ditto.
Margarine. Just received an email today from someone who said that margarine is one atom away from being plastic. All oil and virtually no flavor. I'll stick to butter instead.
Instant tea. An idea whose time has not yet come. Somehow, the earthy bittnerness of "dried leaves soaked in boiling water" is replaced by something more nasty.
Fish and seafood with the head still attached. I love most fish and seafood, but I don't like having my food stare back at me while I eat it. Gives me the willies!
