Top-40 Schlockfest.....

[poltr1]

I've got things to do this weekend -- work on condo association minutes, work-at-home for a client, and taxes. In the meantime, I'll open up the vault of horrors and pull out....


Top-40 singles I don't care to hear ever again!

The first is "Shannon" by Terry Gross. Is he singing about a lost love? No, he singing about his dog who ran away! I know people love their pets, but this one seemed to cross the line for me.

The second is "Rocky" by Austin Roberts. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy ends up with girl's child. It has lines like "Rocky, I've never had to die before. Don't know if I could do it." Blecch.

The third is "Last Game of the Season" by David Geddes. This is the one about the blind man in the bleachers who turns out to be his father, who passes away before the last game. "It's the only time he's ever got to see me play!"

The fourth is "Torn Between Two Lovers" by Mary McGregor. Ah, the quandry of having to choose between one sweetie or another. "Loving both of you is breaking all the rules." Hey lady, if you go poly, you can have both! And the hell with the rules!

The fifth is "Butterfly Kisses" by Bob Carlisle. Beautiful arrangement, but the words are sappy and are sung without any feeling. It's about a father watching his daughter growing up. It's a little creepy. And what are butterfly kisses, anyway?

What made these songs so popular at the time?

Honorable mentions go fo "Undercover Angel" by Alan O'Day and "Afternoon Delight" by the Starland Vocal Band. Nothing like double meaning to get a song some airplay.


So....what are YOUR least favorite top-40 singles? Discuss.

Comments

[phillip2637.livejournal.com]

'The first is "Shannon" by Terry Gross.'

Actually, Henry Gross. When it was current I liked it well enough to buy the album, but I don't think I found anything else worth playing on that one. (I didn't learn about the "dog thing" until much later and it didn't really bother me.)

My great dislike list probably should start with "In the Year 2525" by Zager and Evans. So pompous. So serious. So self-righteous. So preachy.

"I'm a Stranger Here" by The Five Man Electrical Band -- for most of the same reasons, come to think of it. And "Signs" by the same group is a close runner up in the "listen while I bludgeon you with a list of your failures" sweepstakes. (I'm in Canada...things get played and re-played on radio because of Canadian Content rules...it's often painful.)

[poltr1]

Yes, you're right; it's Henry Gross. As they say, memory is the first thing to go as people age; I forgot what the second thing was.

BTW, how many times do you have to endure "Seasons in the Sun" by Terry Jacks?

[bikergeek.livejournal.com]

I never wanted to hear most Top 40 the *first* time. there's also large chunks of "classic rock" I never want to hear again--some of it quite good, I'm just worn out on hearing it.

[peteralway.livejournal.com]

Ooh! Ooh! This one's easy! "Havin' my Baby" by whoever did "Havin' my Baby." The message seems to be "It's so great that you showed your love for me by not having an abortion when I knocked you up." Or to phrase it more acutely "You are having an unwanted child just for me? How sweet!"

I have read a whole lot of lists and articles about horrible pop songs, and frankly, I have yet to see any song on any of those lists that tops (bottoms?) "Havin' my Baby."

Even if you can make a case for other pop songs having stupider or sappier lyrics (though as a childfree-by-choice person, I certainly have trouble concieving worse than "Havin' my baby; what a wonderful way of showing that you're thinking of me."), I actually found some musical value in them when ignoring the words. I was very good at ignoring the words in the 60's and 70's.

[suecochran.livejournal.com]

"Run Joey, Run" and "Billy, Don't Be a Hero".

I actually really liked "Rocky" when I was a young teenager. But that's who those songs are written for.

Given time I could probably come up with some more.

[poltr1]

Aieee! I remember these two!

"Run Joey Run" was another David Geddes song. That makes him a two-hit wonder. And makes people wonder why these were hits at all. :)