Day of Reckoning.
Jun. 23rd, 2018 08:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
poltr1This past week, I ran out of money. I had enough to pay the important bills this month, but not enough for non-essential things, such as the rent on one of my two storage units. This is the smaller (10x10) unit that had reusables and recyclables in there. The rent was due on Saturday the 23rd (i.e. today). I asked the property manager how much of a grace period I'd have, and he told me "three days".
That's when I thought, "That's it. I can't afford to be keeping all this stuff. It is time to purge. And if I don't, I'll be locked out, and the contents will eventually go to auction. I don't want to lose my stuff!"
So I asked several friends if they could help me empty out the unit and schlep it back to my place. Two men said yes -- Cameron and Scott. Cameron helped with one load, (he had a small car and wasn't able to help beyond the one load) and Scott (and his Honda Fit) helped with the rest. After working on Thursday and Friday mornings (before it got too hot to work), we got it emptied late Friday morning.
The items are now in my garage, and it's so packed I can't get to anything except for what's in front. I'm not happy about that, but it will have to do for now.
What was in the storage unit? Glass bottles and jars, plastic bottles, plastic peanut butter jars, paper bags, plastic bags, foam, bubble wrap, cardboard boxes and trays, egg cartons, plastic cups, dairy containers (cottage cheese, sour cream, yogurt, butter, etc.). And why was I saving these things? Because I thought they could be reused, and didn't want them ending up in a landfill, decaying.
And I came to another realization: I'm not just a packrat. I'm a hoarder. I may not be as bad as some of the ones featured on "Hoarders" -- I throw out my trash and empty the cat box on a regular basis. (I'm sure my cats would say to me "But not often enough!")
What I've come to know is that hoarding is currently classified as a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), a;though it could very well be its own standalone diagnosis in the DSM-5. It's like an addiction -- an addiction to having stuff. There is probably a 12-step program for it. It may be genetic or hereditary, and it could also be learned behavior. My parents grew up in the Great Depression of the 1930s, and learned to save everything. While Dad saved wood and metal scraps and made things out of them, Mom was the hoarder. When my sister and I emptied our parents' house back in 2012. she was the principal thrower-outer.
Some people just don't understand hoarding, or they will ridicule someone who does. I remember one time I threw something out that someone else needed (and didn't know that they needed), I was asked, "You threw it out? What good are you?"
Am I a bad person because I hoard? I don't think so. I just happen to be a "stuff" person. I'd rather be surrounded by stuff than people. Stuff may not love me like people do, but then, stuff doesn't tease, mock, or ridicule me. I see the reuse potential for many things that others do not. I'd rather hang on to something than throw it out and have it decay in a landfill, or have to spend money to replace it.
Is there help or treatment available for people like me? Yes! Some psychologists and therapists specialize in OCD and hoarding. There are also companies which specialize in cleaning the clutter from hoarders. I don't want an outfit like 1-800-GOT-JUNK coming in and taking everything away without giving me an opportunity to go through the stuff and decide to keep it, sell it, donate it, or trash it. I did some research and there are a couple of local companies that specializes in cleaning for hoarders.
The rent is due on the other unit, a 10x15, on July 15. I can try to borrow the money for another month's rent, or I can try to empty it out as much as I can before asking for help again. My principal task for the next three weeks is to take out boxes from the unit and go through them, giving them the keep/sell/donate/give-away/recycle/trash process. I have a note on the back of my front door that says "Tear down the wall! Thin out the hoard! 1 box/day minimum." If I can stay focused on this, I will hopefully not feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of stuff, and despair that I would lose it all.
That's when I thought, "That's it. I can't afford to be keeping all this stuff. It is time to purge. And if I don't, I'll be locked out, and the contents will eventually go to auction. I don't want to lose my stuff!"
So I asked several friends if they could help me empty out the unit and schlep it back to my place. Two men said yes -- Cameron and Scott. Cameron helped with one load, (he had a small car and wasn't able to help beyond the one load) and Scott (and his Honda Fit) helped with the rest. After working on Thursday and Friday mornings (before it got too hot to work), we got it emptied late Friday morning.
The items are now in my garage, and it's so packed I can't get to anything except for what's in front. I'm not happy about that, but it will have to do for now.
What was in the storage unit? Glass bottles and jars, plastic bottles, plastic peanut butter jars, paper bags, plastic bags, foam, bubble wrap, cardboard boxes and trays, egg cartons, plastic cups, dairy containers (cottage cheese, sour cream, yogurt, butter, etc.). And why was I saving these things? Because I thought they could be reused, and didn't want them ending up in a landfill, decaying.
And I came to another realization: I'm not just a packrat. I'm a hoarder. I may not be as bad as some of the ones featured on "Hoarders" -- I throw out my trash and empty the cat box on a regular basis. (I'm sure my cats would say to me "But not often enough!")
What I've come to know is that hoarding is currently classified as a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), a;though it could very well be its own standalone diagnosis in the DSM-5. It's like an addiction -- an addiction to having stuff. There is probably a 12-step program for it. It may be genetic or hereditary, and it could also be learned behavior. My parents grew up in the Great Depression of the 1930s, and learned to save everything. While Dad saved wood and metal scraps and made things out of them, Mom was the hoarder. When my sister and I emptied our parents' house back in 2012. she was the principal thrower-outer.
Some people just don't understand hoarding, or they will ridicule someone who does. I remember one time I threw something out that someone else needed (and didn't know that they needed), I was asked, "You threw it out? What good are you?"
Am I a bad person because I hoard? I don't think so. I just happen to be a "stuff" person. I'd rather be surrounded by stuff than people. Stuff may not love me like people do, but then, stuff doesn't tease, mock, or ridicule me. I see the reuse potential for many things that others do not. I'd rather hang on to something than throw it out and have it decay in a landfill, or have to spend money to replace it.
Is there help or treatment available for people like me? Yes! Some psychologists and therapists specialize in OCD and hoarding. There are also companies which specialize in cleaning the clutter from hoarders. I don't want an outfit like 1-800-GOT-JUNK coming in and taking everything away without giving me an opportunity to go through the stuff and decide to keep it, sell it, donate it, or trash it. I did some research and there are a couple of local companies that specializes in cleaning for hoarders.
The rent is due on the other unit, a 10x15, on July 15. I can try to borrow the money for another month's rent, or I can try to empty it out as much as I can before asking for help again. My principal task for the next three weeks is to take out boxes from the unit and go through them, giving them the keep/sell/donate/give-away/recycle/trash process. I have a note on the back of my front door that says "Tear down the wall! Thin out the hoard! 1 box/day minimum." If I can stay focused on this, I will hopefully not feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of stuff, and despair that I would lose it all.
