My work tonight.....

[poltr1]

....was to begin looking at how I carry and present myself. Is there something I'm consciously or unconsciously doing that brings out the verbal assassins I seem to encounter in my life? What is my inner saboteur doing to aid and abet these people?

I need to develop my quiet confidence. I don't need to strut around with my chin in the air and a chip on my shoulder. That's just not me. But I do want to exude a "don't fuck with me" attitude so that people who are inclined to do so have second thoughts about crossing my path.

And maybe that's been my problem all along. Some people see me as an easy mark, a pushover, someone to trifle with. It's time to say "not any more."

Heard a great quote about bears the other day. A bear has the strength to kill a man....but often chooses to not do so.

Comments

[katyhh.livejournal.com]

And maybe that's been my problem all along. Some people see me as an easy mark, a pushover, someone to trifle with. It's time to say "not any more."

I really don't know you all that well, so I might not be qualified to comment. But from what I read here, now and then, I have a different impression.
Maybe your problem is that you ASSUME that everyone is out to get you (i.e. verbally assault you) and thus DO display an aggressive "don't fuck with me" attitude right away even though people might have nothing like that in mind at all?
Body language can make the whole difference!!!
I don't believe that people see you as a pushover. You much more come across like someone whom you better don't anger at all else he explodes. This might prompt people to pull back instead of pushing forward ...

I totally agree with the need for developing a quiet confidence though. But the best thing about a quiet confidence is, if you truly have it, it means you can be sure that people are not against you. Because you KNOW, there is nothing to *be* against. Because you are friendly, calm, and radiate positiveness rather than an aggressive "don't fuck with me" air.

Take care!

[poltr1]

No, you're definitely qualified. You have a somewhat unique vantage point in that you probably know be better online (through LJ) than in person, and we only see each other very briefly at filk cons.

You're right; I believe I project or superimpose lots of things onto people I see around me every day. Certain things or traits trigger previous experiences or encounters in my life. I need to be more aware of this when I'm doing this, even unconsciously.

Thank you for the kind words! I'm trying to be a more positive force in this world. Some days I am, and some days I'm not.